The past is imagined.

Dear Destiny,
I can't hear you. 
-Me

Think in the morning. Act in the noon. Eat in the evening. Sleep in the night. -William Blake

Un, Deux, Trois.

You and me both, Anais.

There can be no great skies without the viewer. ... Can there be?

The Moon in Madrid, Spain - January 2006.

Double Vision

I see that you're in my way,
expectant woman

We look alike,
don't we

You move
to stop the sun
from shining on my mind
to stop time
to stop time

And I have sympathy

I know why you stand there
I know why you can't let me pass
I know you are made of steel and pain
I am like you, woman

But now, I am present
And I now know, what everybody knows
you cannot stop time
you cannot stop clarity
you could not stop that thing from happening
you cannot stop me from healing
you cannot stop me from fighting back
this body is mine
it belongs to no one but me

Move back, woman
I am glass, I am iron, I am white light, I am night
I summon the winds
I change the tides
I crack dimensions
and stitch up psyches
with needles with thread with fire with metal

When we finally meet, who will yield?

Pajaro Negro

East of the Sun by Billie Holiday

The Nightmare

Do you see the crow watching?
Why is he watching?
There is no answer.
The mind. The body. The heart. The soul.
Seams ripped out.
Dreaming of the black peace.

Baby Baby Baby
The stem was cut roughly, and I bled
But we were together.
I was underwater, dark waters, but swimming.
Moving towards you.

And then they tried to drown me
But I shook shook shook my way back
They twisted my tongue
But I wouldn't stop grunting.
They shoved me into an electronic coffin headfirst,
again, and again.
But I meditated with the gurus in the color orange
and fought my way out.

And in the moment when it was closest
When my racing mind was terrorized
When they sent my family out of the room
When the sea turned into strange faces and
pin light, screams, tension, medicine
In that moment the crow flew in.
And he watches.
And since then, every single person I ask
does not know
when he is going to leave.

For all of their training, for all of their love,
for all of their expertise, for all of their pills,
they have no answers.

None of them know how to open a window.

They say, "I survived."

Maybe an elephant with its broad back and slow pace
Will carry me to sleep
Will put one foot in front of the other
slowly heavily
and before the night falls
I will be dreaming
Inside the womb with my child
Connecting with him before he's born
Holding onto each other
Bracing for the coming storm
The roof of the house is peeling off slowly
Soft tornadoes I see them everywhere
Twister twister you are simply coming for me,
quietly dancing your way straight to my mind and body
And I have to learn to learn to learn
that fear is only temporary
to let myself be flung to the cliffs and under the ocean
There is no more time
There is a crystal that dangles over my forehead
Grandfather guide me
Grandfather warrior remind me of what its like
after the ravaging stops.

Rhymes.

Witches witches in the air Witches witches everywhere Touch the wind Around their flight While the witches dance tonight. xo

From the Archives c. July 2011

Spring and More

"Rejoice with your family in this beautiful land of life." - A. Einstein

The Stuttering Chamber for the Engine of My REM Cycle